I have always been fond of stories. I like how they get me out of where I am, my imagination free to construct a different world, one where I am the protagonist, the usurper or simply an observer.
I used to think that I would end up writing a book and would spend hours together thinking of a decent plot.
Both of these traits had the effect that I was never really a part of my world. I lived within this world like someone taken hostage with no interest even disdain for we're my life was taking me. But that has to change. I have to face my life with honesty. So I have decided to tell you my story. Only I am not entirely sure where to begin.....
Let us begin from the point in time when my life began its path down a somewhat concrete future. The brief interlude between courses where the black dots you inked into circles decide your future occupation. Anyone from Bangalore will know about this quite well. To anyone outside India I guess I can only compare it to the SATs in America. There is no specific exam to write and so students are obliged to prepare for the ones they sit, each unique in their level of difficulty and the rules they followed.
During my sisters time she had applied for multiple exams in 3 different states and in the end she counted only on 3.
Somehow unconsciously knowing that my chances were slim in any of them I chose to attend only 3. Of the three my chances were the best only for 1. CET. The others were disasters waiting to happen.
I remember going to the first one, staring at the empty sheet and looking around at the room.
I had only registered for the exam so that I would receive a wake-up call to get me studying for CET. I never really expected to get through it but it was still unnerving to see all those people marking away the answers. I remember seeing this extremely pretty girl sitting a few feet diagonal to me. Pink top, black jeans and ballet flats. She was wearing a her hair in a pony tail to keep it out of her face. Calming myself I spent the rest of the hour staring at a bespectacled beauty next to me, while she furiously inked her answers in.
So I hit the books as hard as I could, which is code for not very. I mean I looked at the tuition material given to me. (That was the only action they had seen all year. Till the day they were handed over they retained their 'new book' smell.) I focused upon Chemistry and Biology. I always did love Biology, something that I can ascribe it to my crush on my highschool teacher and my very amazing teachers at PUC.
Physics excites me as well, in a philosophical way. Somehow all those theories make me see life in a totally different way. As a subject that I needed to study however it ranked at the same level as Maths. I guess in the end it came down to my nature. I was pretty lazy. Still am. So I never bothered to sit and work out problems and sums. Therefore my aversion to subjects which have them persists to this day.
And so, ill prepared as I was I attended CET. The fact that I found a relatively easy examination difficult was not lost on me. Resigning myself to not a very respectable result I went back home.
The last exam was a bit of a joke really. AIEEE. I have no idea why I chose that one. I even got a rank. 48 thousand in state. 2.3 lakh in the country. Lol. If any of you remember that was the year that there was a minor mishap. Something to do with opening the answer booklet before the exam time. The exam was delayed by 2-4 hrs. I remember wanting to ditch the exam and going home to eat freshly made byriani. My father however convinced me to stay and write the paper.
Post exams I knew that I was in trouble. I spent the break at my native dreading the results. Each day the gnawing at the pit of my stomach in creased. I even began to pray that they wouldn't come.
And like all bad things the results came out anyway. My engineering rank was a 4 digit one. According to my parents not a good one. Apparently if i had gotten higher i would have been able to get into a good college in a course of my choice. It all seemed quite abstract to me I had nothing to compare that information with so the rank held no real meaning for me.
And then my sister says that I got a 3 digit one in Medicine. I just nod and wonder what to say to my parents. And then she screams out my rank in disbelief. Apparently it was good, really good. An assured seat. Surprised? Yeah you and me both.
What was even more surprising was the ludicrous disparity in the ranks, considering that 2 of the subject they use to assign the ranks were the same. I don't think my family expected anything quite like that and I don't blame them. I never really gave them a reason to.
Then of course there were family meetings. Gatherings where my sister voiced her surprise and my parents showed their price. They were happy for me and so was I. I could choose of course, whether I wanted to be an engineer or a doctor. In the end the answer seemed obvious.
The happycynic chose to be a doctor.
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